Things That Terrify Me Less Than Losing My Health Insurance

  1. An asteroid hurtling towards Earth. (At least we’re all in this together.)

 

  1. Roaches. Lots of roaches. (Gross, but not fatal.)

 

  1. Being stuck in a room in the Amityville Horror House for a week.

 

  1. Being struck by lightning. (Much, much less likely to happen.)

 

  1. Being vaporized by an atomic bomb. (Quick and painless compared to a long, drawn out battle with brain inflammation.)

 

  1. Zombies. (They’ll eat your brain, but at least they’ll do it quickly- unlike lupus, which devours your brain slowly over many months).

 

  1. Getting into a car accident. (It’s not the car insurance companies that are turning me away because of my preexisting condition.)

 

  1. A pack of rabid wolves. (You can’t climb a tree to get away from lupus).

 

  1. A swarm of eight million mosquitos. (One of my lupus medications doubles as an antimalarial.)

 

  1. Tax season when you’re self-employed.

 

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